O César o nada

O César o nada, its all or nothing. O César

o nada, I must tell you something — O César o

nada — nothing or all, o César o nada, I shall not

fall, o O César o nada, you and me — what will be is shall

and meant to be, o O César o nada, we shall again meet — as

Fernando and Isabel united Spain, and Isabel de Portugal served

regent for her emperador, I know again we’ll be against the rocky

shores, as like ours, both unions were abandoned for awhile, before

either relationship truly begun, we were already together once, twice, you

and I are already twelve steps ahead — just stop it now, don’t be afraid– O César

o nada, my love. Come back, for O César o nada, we are each other’s destiny, O

César o nada, its you and me, O César o nada, where fate soon leads. O César o

nada, I’ve done my best, O César o nada, ritorna, come back, show me something

built to last. O César o nada, I am yours, and you are mine, O César o nada, you’re a

lready here, showing yourself all in due time. O César o nada, I let you and trust in

God to lead, O César o nada, us back together, tanto monta, monta tanto, our destiny. O

César o nada, you can run, but you can’t escape the fates. O César o nada, don’t

forget, dear one, not all is left to God, but given to man for his role to play. O César o

nada, time your time, get ready. O César o nada, I know your heart is full and heavy, but

O César o nada — the most precious thing we’re losing is time. O César o nada — call or

text me now, O César o nada, no one games — again let I be yours, and you be mine.

O César o nada — we cannot turn back the hands of time. O César o nada — but

we can begin, O César o nada, be in the present, be not afraid, for I was and am

always yours, and you were and are always mine. O César o nada, O César o nada,

O César o nada, O César o nada — let us reunite, happy and mature, creating our

future tanto monta, monta tanto — all in God’s time.

  • Julia St. Clair, ©2017, 11:49 AM

Positivity & Light: Welcome June!

Buon giorno tutti, e felice prima di giugno! That’s “good morning everyone, and happy June 1st!” in Italian. Today is the start of a brand new month, one that I feel nothing but happiness and positive vibes about. Historically, June has always been a prime month in my life where many chances occurred. From graduating junior high (I graduated high school and college in May), to losing my grandparents within exactly a year and two weeks of each other (my grandmother ascended three days before her birthday), realizing my love for la citta just as I left Rome and recovered my repressed love for the city in general (ti amo, Manhattan) to going to concerts, being a bridesmaid in my cousin’s wedding, taking finals and regents, even starting a new job, many of life’s large journeys crossed their paths during this time of the year, and I’m on high alert — but in a good way. Therefore, I want to spread the joy and positive energy out there for anything and everything that is to come.

It’s also the month of St. Anthony, the patron saint of miracles and lost things in Catholicism. Whether you’re skeptical or not, this saint has done the impossible for myself and my friends for God knows how long. From helping my great-grandmother during a dangerous childbirth with my grandfather, finding my cousin’s now-husband, and helping me in various aspects of my life, it’s no surprise as to why he’s my favorite saint and beloved intercessor. His feast day is June 13th, a day that is not to be feared because of the modern legend of the number, but to be celebrated and multiplied with positive intent, energy, healing, and love.

Here’s a short *prayer to get the month started and lift your spirits up. May happiness and love fill your heart, and, as the Grateful Dead said, “once in a while you get shone the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right.” Avere un giungo Benedetto!

Caro Dio — Dear Lord,

As we enter this sacred month, help me to remain calm and

be fruitful in all that I do. Help me and assist me, Dear Lord, in

fulfilling my goals and finally obtaining– and regaining– my

heart’s true desires. Let my mind be not troubled, but ever

growing and glowing in grace, knowledge, wisdom, and love. And

thank you, God, thank you, Jesus, thank you, Holy Spirit, thank you,

Blessed Virgin Mary, and thank you, St. Anthony, patron saint

of miracles and returning lost people and items–and all the angels and saints and

ancestors hearing me–for all that has been given and the even

better things that are to come. And so it is– amen.

*this prayer is open to all regardless of religion or faith. Names can be switched out or changed to the participant’s liking.

 

Fort Lauderdale 2017

My best friend Lauren and I went to south Florida for vacation a month ago. While staying in Fort Lauderdale, we dazzled in exploring the city along with Hollywood, Miami Beach, and South Beach. This photo was taken on her iPhone7 at Fort Lauderdale Beach via the Sunrise Blvd. entrance.

via Photo Challenge: Friend

Buff-a-Dub-Dub

Buff-a-dub-dub, three hands

in a tub — scrubbing the grim away

in vain effortlessly to show the surface,

to make her clean. Buff-a-dub-dub — embers

glow in the tub as the dark, sticky

covering was erased. Buff-a-dub-dub — true

light, true hope, true love radiates forth from

the tub, detonating a glow that renews and

refreshes her face — she is at peace.

The Qualm was there…

…from the beginning. When I saw

you sitting there. Peacefully plotting

my downfall…as your mousy demeanor hid

the ugliness that lie beneath such a plain

face…

 

That Qualm remained as I knew the girl

behind the face — every bit as dull inside as

was the exterior…yet this dullness held a

darkness, so black and cold like no one I

ever knew…she could be sweet, a best

friend one minute, before stabbing you in

the back after two…

 

The Qualm was there…yet I still felt bad…you

were the replacement for something, someone

whom I once had…yet I cared for you, though you

no longer deserved it…I kept you in my life, called

you “friend,” though you soured my image, putting my

face to your ugliness…you’re an amazing actress…no

surprise to whom they believed…yet I felt bad and

still defended you…

 

That Qualm took hold of my mind when you

ripped the love out of my heart…you knew he was

mine for years, right from the start…no poetic words

to hide…you stole my boyfriend…like a thief in the

night, only you were never his. I was. I still

am, though I surrendered the white flag long ago,

even before that, you declared your illicit

affair “romantic”…Jezebel! You took my place before I

even left. Bravo, Madame de Poitiers. Nice work, Anne

Boleyn — going from side chick to his, though your

replacement will come one day, just you wait. Perhaps

she already has…

 

The Qualm was there, that qualm ignored. My lesson

was learnt, now I do as the mind and heart as one are

taught. I listen to my instinct, that way again I shall never

be…led astray and destroyed by another evil, soulless thing.

  • Julia St. Clair©2017

 

via Daily Prompt

 

Changes in Self-Discovery and Realization: The Single Life, Good Friends & Tiempo per me

Sola— it’s no secret its been this way for me for over four years (five later on this year), and there’s only been one “Ghost of Christmas Past,” whom it felt as though he were five different men because his personalities and mental health were so complex. It took me years to realize the task I undertook being in a serious relationship at such a young age. I said in the past how I tried, and cried, for years to get back into a relationship, and towards the end of 2016, I realized I don’t need nor want one.

How did I come to this realization? Online dating; I tried it, yet again, having a much better experience this time around than previous ones (advice time: Bumble is awesome, stay away from OK Cupid, nothing but creeps looking for one night stands). I spoke with a variety of men, some weird, some cool, and one really nice and sweet. I even planned dates with some of them, and connected on social media. Yet despite these recent turn of events, I knew in my heart after having this positive experience on something I once thought desperate, even negatively, about that it’s not the right time for me. Per Me– for me. I never truly endured or experienced time for myself. I’ve had plenty of it, but it wasn’t until 2016 that I knew what to do with it. I was always used to being so-and-so’s daughter, so-and-so’s girlfriend, so-and-so’s friend that I had no idea how to truly be myself.

Another thing is I spent way too much time with the wrong people. When you waste time trying to fit in with individuals who possess no want, desire, nor need for you, it’s soul draining. For the record, I’m not here to demonize anyone; these are good people. We just didn’t go well with each other anymore. Maybe we never did after we explored other groups outside of My Chemical Romance, the band that bonded us all together. Maybe they incorporated me into the group more because they pitied me over everything that happened with my ex. Perhaps they thought they could change me, and I won’t lie, I thought I could influence them, too. Either way, the flame died, and there’s nothing we can do about it except smile and move on. I may not have many friends, but they are the most trustworthy, amazing individuals I’ve encountered so far in my 22-and-a-half years of life. I also have numerous acquaintances and colleagues who are awesome people, too. This attitude and more sets me apart with how I once was and most of those I left behind. Two things, actually: I’m grateful and always feel of hope.

Therefore, 2017 is the year of me– tiempo per me. Get a full-time job, start a career, have fun with friends, travel (even if it’s only the subway into Manhattan) and, if God wills and I feel its the right time, maybe just maybe date again. Namaste myself because as Stephen Hawking put it, “when there is life, there is hope.” Grazie mille.